love, Love, and LOVE
We all have our own personal definition of what love is. For some, love is that is felt with that special someone. For others, it’s all consuming, re-defining everything that they do.
A mother’s love for a child is not the same as romantic love or the love for her own parents. But it’s very much still LOVE.
What is unconditional love?
Unconditional love is loving without ANY conditions whatsoever. It’s easy to love when things are great. Especially at the beginning stages of a relationship, where everything is rosy, it’s easy to love completely and without reservation. We all do!
It’s when reality starts to set in that challenges come. When people get involved, when the third wheel becomes part of your relationship, when the mother in law finds a way to insult or hurt you, when your mate steps out on you, when they lie, when they cheat, when they are dishonest, when they do things to purposely hurt you is when your love is tested.
Unconditional love requires that you overlook every single thing that they have done. It not only expects it of you, it demands it.
It’s not for the faint of heart. It’s not for those who have “options”, not for those who can’t see the forest for the trees. Unconditional love is a badge of honor worn by only the fiercest of love warriors, who have not only survived being dropped from 1000 feet without a parachute but who have also recovered AND found their way home to reclaim what is rightfully theirs.
Forgive without forgetting
It’s often said that we must “forgive and forget”. The only trouble is that when you forget, you are bound to repeat the same mistakes again and again. It’s important to forgive your mate for their wrongs. It’s not only important, it’s a crucial element of unconditional love. If you can’t forgive, you can’t love unconditionally.
Forgiving without forgetting is so much harder than simply pushing it out of your mind in the hope that it will never happen again. Forgetting is never a good idea. Forgive, but do deal with the problem, find the source, get to the root of it and dig it out. Lay over the area with new soil, plant seeds that will continue to grow, year after year. The biggest problem is that we forgive, we forget and then hope for the best. Facing your problems, your faults, their faults through love is the only way to ensure that you don’t have to face the same painful experiences again and again.
The trouble with dumping someone because they hurt you is this: You are running from your pain, running from your lessons and refusing to face what part you may have played in creating this painful experience. A love warrior doesn’t run from the face of danger, they fight for what is right. They fight everyone and anyone who stands in the way of their soulmate, their happiness and being at one with their true love. They are especially keen on facing themselves.
Weapons of a True Love Warrior
No matter who it is that is in your life, no matter what they have done, how they screwed up or lost their way, you are the only one who can determine what the outcome will be.
Unconditional love brings out the best in us. It challenges us to do better and RISE to every occasion. Unconditional love is not something that you receive. It’s earned. Years of pain, suffering, and disappointment are part of the process. Some will call you crazy, misguided, hopeless and beyond help. That you’re wasting your life waiting for someone who doesn’t really love you.
Unconditional love is what true LOVE really is. It’s what you see with couples who have MADE IT through thick and thin. Who have suffered, endured and can STILL speak of the joy that they feel with their partners. Love doesn’t give up, give in or hope that someone else can fill in the blanks.
That doesn’t mean that you won’t be lonely. It doesn’t mean that you won’t have to go a different journey in your life while your partner is exploring the world and his options. You may suffer before experiencing unconditional love. You will be made to feel things that most people won’t ever understand. But the reward of unconditional love is it’s own. There is not a deeper love, a more fulfilling love and a greater love than one that has been fought for, bled for and where you have died many deaths claiming.
Falling in love is only the beginning
Unconditional love is true love. It’s not just the love of a child, the love of a lover, it’s not just falling in love, it’s not just soulmate love, it’s all of those things and more. It’s a love that cannot be broken. It’s a love that cannot and will not give up, no matter what is faced, it rises to the occasion. It survives the hurricanes of life and the winters of loneliness.
When everyone around you tries to convince you to move on, it remains, hiding sometimes, where no one can see. It’s always there. It’s a love that has its beginnings in creation. When the world was formed, so were you both, created as ONE soul. To prove that love, you were split into two halves. A part of you in the East and a part of you in the West. You were meant to find each other. That is what you’ve always been looking for, hoping for and praying for your entire existence.
Finding them is only the beginning. Falling in love gives you a quick taste of what is to come. It does not begin or end there. It just gives you an idea of what is ahead. Nothing good comes easily, nor is anything that comes easily good.
You are perfectly matched, except for the things that keep you apart. Ego, personality traits, habits that we picked up or were taught. Past experiences that have scared us into thinking that we need to act or think a certain way, family interference and all sorts of things that try to divide you and distract you from your own true happiness.
There is a happy ending for all who believe. Unconditional love is not found but earned. Fight for what is right, believe in what is true and through it all, SHINE.
Contributing Advisor: Divine Messenger Zuco